I want to feel everything. I felt fake;like a figment of my own imagination. I looked out the window and did mybest to hide my tears from her. I don't know how long I wallowed in my own self-pity. Maybe it was onlya few minutes. Slowly I started to pull myself out of the mess I'd madeand told myself that I still had options open to me. No, I would neverbe one hundred percent female, but I could get pretty darn close thanksto modern science. Who knows what they may come up with in the nexttwenty years? Buoyed by that thought, I made an attempt to get myself presentable.Thankfully, I had gone with waterproof mascara, so my makeup wasn't tooterrible. After checking it in the visor vanity mirror and making a fewrepairs, I was reasonably happy. My attention was then refocused to mydate that had been going so well up till my meltdown."Sorry, about that, Bec," I apologized."Was it something I did?" she asked worriedly."No, not at all. I just kind of freaked about not being what I shouldbe.. A perfect smile, topped off by a figure nearly every girl in school envied. This was my best friend, Nikki. Although as I looked at her lying next to me, I had to admit, she wasn’t looking her best.My parents were away in Devon for the weekend and yes, you guessed it, a small ‘social gathering’ took place the night before.I’m not a big lover of alcohol, unlike Nikki. And seeing as the house belongs to my parents, there was no way I was going to get completely wasted and allow the place to get totally trashed. I gently pushed back her hair out of her face and stroked her cheek.“Nikki?” I whispered. “Are you okay?” “Hmmmm” she groaned. She grudgingly opened her eyes, then scrunched them up again, seemingly irritated by the sunlight poking through my bedroom curtains. .
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